If you change the way you think…you will change the way you feel. How many times have you heard of this? Probably many times.

Well, it is true. If you are thinking negative thoughts, your self-talk will be one of negativity. Consequently, your negative mood and behavior will most certainly follow. Also, low self-esteem can occur with these penetrating thoughts making life miserable and self-tormenting.

However, if you are mindful about your thoughts (because if you are not aware of your thoughts, you have no means of changing them), there can be purposeful change. Most of the time in our busy lives, we are unaware of many things we do everyday, the many things we say all the time, and certainly, the many things we think.

We may just stop short of what we feel, but do not realize the extent of where these feelings are coming from. Most people do not just “blow up” after one irritating event. It is most often cumulative and thoughts of negative emotions from events that happen during the course of the day.

There are many ways to become aware of your thoughts that lead to negative emotions. Some mindful things include:

1. Journaling – Just writing short notes on your self talk is helpful to be mindfully aware of the conversation with yourself. Just stop and ask, “What was I just telling myself?”

2. Exercise – By exercising just 30 minutes per day, you can increase frustration tolerance and boost your mood, thus having more positive thoughts, positive self-talk and just feeling better.

3. Share – Visit with a friend or family member that you enjoy. Your self-talk will be more memorable and more nurturing.

4. Be Aware – Realize and be mindful when you feel resentful or irritated with a person or circumstance. They may bring out the negative self talk that is deeper than you can connect with easily.

5. Know Yourself – Ask yourself if your self-talk is your own, or are you listening to the voice of another in your head that is reverberating? Is it your spouse’s voice or your parent’s voice that you are listening to? Be mindful of things you are trying to overcome in your life.

6. Therapy – Give yourself the gift of therapy. If it is too much to manage on your own, realize this and get help. You may also benefit from medication and psychotherapy.

7. FINALLY, be your own best friend! You would not criticize your best friend so easily as you would yourself, would you? Give yourself a break. Give yourself a vacation. Give yourself choices and even presents. Be mindful about your living. This can translate to mindful thinking, mindful eating, mindful shopping, anything that needs your attention...mindfully.